By Harriette Luscombe: Westside Wellness Consultant
If you keep an eye on the health conversations floating around the professional spaces of Birmingham’s Westside, you’ll notice a distinct shift. The focus has largely moved away from purely physical milestones, like counting macro-nutrients or tracking daily steps down Broad Street and towards something far more complex: sustainable mental resilience.
Yet, as Men’s Health Week approaches, some men still find themselves stuck using an outdated strategy to handle the pressures of modern work and life.
It’s an unspoken rule passed down through generations of workplace culture: when the pressure mounts, you put your head down and you power through. But what if that exact brand of grit is actually a silent threat to your health?
Photo Credit: Nate Johnson
The Trap of Misunderstood Stoicism
Lately, our collective desire for resilience has been backed up by a huge cultural resurgence in ancient Stoic philosophy. Bookshops, podcasts, and social media feeds are packed with advice on how to remain unbothered, develop a thick skin, and master your reactions to a chaotic world.
There is immense value in those classical principles. However, a problem arises when a modern, simplified version of “stoicism” is used to justify emotional suppression. A deep-seated belief emerges that you can overcome any environmental or emotional stressor through sheer willpower, unrelenting hard work, and single-minded determination.
In a fast-paced environment like the Westside business district, this mindset is incredibly easy to internalise. We apply it to everything:
● An overwhelming workload at the office? Work longer hours.
● Struggling with a personal life transition? Ignore it and keep moving.
● Feeling isolated or anxious? Just push past it; it will pass.
The problem is the psychological and physical cost. Pioneering research by Stanford psychologist Dr James Gross into emotion regulation has proved that treating yourself like a machine and constantly hiding outward signs of stress. This process is known as Expressive Suppression and can cause your sympathetic nervous system to remain perpetually switched on. This floods your body with chronic stress hormones, severely impacting cardiovascular health, immune function, and sleep quality.
Furthermore, Dr Gross discovered that masking your feelings acts like a massive background download on a smartphone, consuming vast amounts of prefrontal cortex energy. The data shows it actively impairs memory and cognitive performance.
Grit has its place. But when “powering through” becomes your only tool for dealing with life’s heavy lifting, you aren’t actually coping, you are just drawing heavily on a biological credit card that will eventually bounce.
Shifting the Setting: Side-by-Side Connection
Addressing this doesn’t mean you need to schedule an intensive emotional debrief or immediately book a therapy session.
Psychologist Paul Wright categorised friendship dynamics into two distinct styles: “face-to-face” and “side-by-side.” While face-to-face interactions (common in female friendships) rely on direct, highly focused emotional dialogue, male social dynamics are heavily oriented around side-by-side interaction. Men typically build trust, lower their defenses, and decompress while sharing a physical space or participating in a low-stakes external activity.
When you are looking at a shared focal point rather than directly at each other, the pressure drops. The brain stops viewing openness as a risk, and genuine, casual conversations about work pressure, life, and personal wellbeing begin to surface entirely on their own.
Photo Credit: Nonresident
The Westside BID Low-Pressure Reset
To celebrate Men’s Health Week properly, we need to stop viewing health as a solo endurance sport. Here is how to swap high-effort “powering through” for genuine psychological recovery right here in Westside:
● The Shared Commute Loop: Instead of rushing straight to the bus stop or the car park alone, arrange to walk part of the way with a colleague. A casual stroll down towards Broadway Plaza or around the loops near the National Sealife Centre creates an effortless side-by-side setting where you can chat without the intense formality of an office environment.
● The Unplugged Lunch Break: Break the cycle of eating at your desk while replying to pings. Take 15 minutes to find a spot on the Library of Birmingham’s terrace or a bench in Oozells Square. Removing the constant stream of digital notifications breaks the “scarcity mindset” that keeps your stress levels elevated.
● Activity-First Socials: If you are catching up with friends or colleagues this week, switch up the format. Meet at one of the spots along Brindleyplace or Broad Street that offers a casual, built-in distraction—whether that’s watching a live match or playing a casual game. Let the activity do the heavy lifting of breaking the ice, giving your mind a chance to unwind naturally.
The Alternative to “Powering Through”
A resilient mind isn’t one that ignores the warning lights on the dashboard; it’s one that knows when to pull into the pit stop. True Stoic philosophy teaches us to focus on what we can control, and one thing you can control is giving yourself permission to take a strategic pause rather than relying on sheer determination.
